Lancaster intensive care nurse's NHS pride during 'historic' coronavirus pandemic

Rachel Holme has been working on the Intensive Care Unit at the Royal Lancaster Infirmary for the last 18 months, but nothing could have prepared her and the rest of the team for what they have experienced since the coronavirus pandemic struck the UK last month.

Rachel, 38, is one of many people working tirelessly on the frontline, putting themselves at risk day after day as they fight to help prevent patients from sadly succumbing to the deadly virus.

But she said the team spirit remains strong and she is proud of how everyone has coped in the face of adversity.

Mum-of-two Rachel has barely seen her husband Craig or children, Joseph, 11, and five-year-old Georgia, in the last few weeks but understands the sacrifices that must be made to keep everyone safe.

She has been working 12-hour shifts, usually on a two-week rota of day and night shifts.

"Craig works at Heysham Power Station, and a lot of the time we have been working opposite shifts," she said. "But we feel so grateful to have our jobs.

"Some of the time I have been staying at the Toll House in Lancaster, and there are so many amazing businesses out there that are helping.

"There has been a lot of good community spirit and it's really appreciated, because there's always that chance that you take something back home to your family.

"I feel a bit guilty sometimes staying in the hotel away from the family, because you want to be there for them and keep them safe as well, but we are in the middle of a pandemic and you want to be there for your team as well.

"You don't want to feel like you are letting anyone down.

"The teamwork that we have got on ICU is one of the things I love about it. The skills and teamwork have definitely contributed to our success rate of sending people home.

"I am very proud of our team and what we have had to cope with."

Rachel watched from close quarters as the threat of the virus grew in the UK.

"In the early days you saw everything in the national media but didn't really worry about it, and I think a lot of people thought it was just the media building it up, but then once you saw what was happening in Italy it was different," she said.

"What I have liked about our hospital is how they have prepared; we have prepared for the worst case scenario.

"The worst part of it all was the fear of the unknown, and the first week did take us over capacity but we were prepared for it.

"I feel more at ease now that we are flattening the curve. It's been bad but there's never been a point like we have seen in Italy; we have been stretched but definitely not over-run like that.

"I think a lot of people have had a view because of what they have seen on TV that if they get Covid they end up on ICU, but most people will come onto a medical ward for some extra oxygen and don't come anywhere near us; it's usually the people with underlying health issues that we see.

"It can be two days or it can be two weeks, but generally speaking, three to four days in ICU is the turnaround. We don't want people staying in ICU longer than they need to, we want people back to their wards as soon as possible.

"We were very busy for a few weeks, but things have quietened down a bit now, although that can bring a new worry of what will happen when the lockdown is lifted.

"It's the fear of whether this will happen again."

Rachel said she believes she has already recovered from a mild form of coronavirus, despite testing negative.

"In the very first week I had a cough and was feeling a bit poorly," she said. "I had no energy but I didn't have a temperature.

"I had a test which was negative, but a lot of Covid patients will get a couple of negative swabs before they get a positive one."

Rachel has worked as a nurse since 2005, and says it was always her vocation.

"My step-mum was a nurse and I think I wanted to be a nurse too from being young," she said. "ICU is just perfect for me, I just love it, although it can be very sad sometimes.

"One thing that's not nice at the moment is not being able to comfort people. We are in full PPE and normally I would hug people, I am a big hugger, and I can't do that.

"But we have had some compliments from people who have been thankful for helping them through it all who have now recovered, which has been nice."

Rachel is keeping an online diary of her experiences of Covid-19 as a permament record and reminder of what she went through during this historic time.

Sharing her thoughts about the virus and the work being done by the NHS has helped her to stay sane, as well as giving comfort to other NHS workers going through the same traumatic time.

"My blog is helping me to process everything," she said. "I like to talk about things and share, and some of the other nurses have said it has been nice to read my blog so they know that there's someone else feeling the same way.

"It doesn't feel real sometimes. There's an element of 'it's just my job' and then other people remind me I am working in this historic time that people will be looking back on in years to come.

"You have to desensitise yourself a bit when you are in the middle of it or you would go crazy if you thought about it too much.

"You have got to create a bit of a barrier and you have to push those thoughts away.

"I have spoken to nurses who have never had a panic attack before in their life and then suddenly they have had one in the middle of Asda because they are thinking about it all in their down time.

"Our occupational health team has been really good on that. We have got counselling sessions if we need them.

"I am quite resilient but it's really important to know that this is not a normal situation and different people cope differently and have different worries."

Rachel, who lives in Bare, said hearing the public clapping for the NHS every Thursday evening has helped keep them going.

"It makes me proud," she said. "There have been a couple of times when I have been on ICU and we have heard people doing the clap.

"There was one patient one time who had just had his tubes taken out and there were tears coming down his face.

"It's poignant when you think about all the health workers who have died from it too.

"When I have been off work, the kids have got me outside clapping. I don't just do it for the NHS, I do it for everybody, and I think about what people are giving up to help."

You can read Rachel's blog - "Diary of an ICU nurse - The lipstick behind the mask" - here